We like Paul Griffiths

September 18, 2009

I have news! Oh, I’m so excited even though it isn’t much. In my last blog post I told you about the girl who I share similarities with, right? Well, my friend Antoinette introduced me to her! Even though we haven’t spoken much, I would love, love, love it if I could be considered one of her close friends eventually. I have this plan in my head that I will go to the All Time Low concert with her in November.

I asked her about her Babycakes shirt one morning. Then I asked if she met the Babycakes guy at Warped Tour and she said, “Oh you mean Paul Griffiths? No, I wish. I bought that shirt at Warped Tour.” Then I told her I was there and gushed how cute Paul Griffiths is. As we made our way to her locker I asked who her favorite band she saw at Warped was and guess what she said… ALL TIME LOW!! You don’t even now how excited I was then and there! (Gosh, I haven’t typed this many exclamation points in such a long time. Nor have been this excited about a new friend.)

I wrote my first Science Current Event article yesterday which I turned in today. I feel pretty proud of it. It’s about how black patients seem less likely to survive cardiac arrest than white patients. I also finished my geography “exam” today.

I have so much new music to share with you, but I guess I will save some of it. First of all, I was listening to old You Me At Six demo songs on YouTube and I think I like their old sound better. Listen to “Promise, Promise” compared to “Finders Keepers”. They have changed immensely. Secondly, I like a guy who calls himself Owl City. I get to go to one of his free shows in October. Lastly, I finally bought All Time Low’s new album, Nothing Personal Wednesday night when I was supposed to be doing my homework. Oh well, music is better. Wait – one last thing. I have enough money to go see The Used and Brand New! I should celebrate. All of this makes me wonder if anyone has noticed my mood change.

Song Of The Day – “Lights Out” by Santigold http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwNkuw-YTVo


It remains a mystery.

June 13, 2009

6/12/09

This week has been tiring. Waking up at six in the morning to attend summer school. Though this summer school is really just an orientation to prepare me for the new school year, I am no fan. Each day in PE I have had to do ninety crunches, ten or more push-ups, wall squats, running (but that was pretty easy and surprisingly fun) and today an exersize called six inches. I can handle the crunches but those darn push-ups make my wee little arms wobble. Yes, I do have muscles, but they aren’t massive.
The school days are fairly short (they end at 12:20 PM) yet there is still the bus ride home. I don’t even have any idea how many kids ride my bus, but it can take up to an hour for me to make it safely back to my front door. The bus driver is no help. Whenever she nears my house she passes it up for another stop farther away. That annoys me. A lot. All I can say right now is thank gawd for Fridays!!

I sighed in relief when I got home. I just wanted some time to myself, to think. Extra time to listen to my favorite albums and more importantly, time to write!

I was on the computer this afternoon, checking my email when my mother suggested she would take me to the mall. Or should I say Hot Topic? I was excited to spend the last of my money because I am no good at saving it, and I had enough for a T-shirt or two. If any of you have read some of my previous posts, the first thing that came to mind was Eli. I have never seen him there on a Friday night, but it’s summer time now, schedules change, so you never know. I won’t lie, my heart did feel a little odd. It felt like it sped up for a second.

I walked into Hot Topic wearing my new plaid, blue and pink, button-down Urban Outfitters shirt. (I was glad I could wear my fancy new shirt out.) I didn’t know what I was looking for in Hot Topic. I hadn’t been into Hot Topic for ages it seemed. But I did have a Kings Of Leon shirt in mind. This winter someone *cough, cough* Lance *cough, cough* told me they didn’t like Kings Of Leon. I acted mock appalled and “gasped”. You see, I like irony so the next time I see him with his kids I’ll say, “Oh yeah, KINGS OF LEON BABY!” and point to my shirt. Ironic, eh?

I looked around the store, no Eli. I was almost affraid he didn’t work there anymore (and I still am actually). So I browsed the CD section and eyed the employee picks intensely. I couldn’t see Eli’s name anywhere. It’s not like I talk to him or anything, but it would be nice to see a cute guy’s face every once and a while. To see his clammy pale face matched with dark brown, almost black hair. Sweet eyes and golden eyelashes. His slight frame and dare I say swagger? This may sound creepy, but if a guy you think is cute kinda likes you too that’s not so bad (or at least acts like he likes you). I can easily say I am a hopeless romantic, but I’m not searching for love. Not at this age, no friggen’ way man.

I waked out of Hot Topic with the Kings Of Leon shirt (it even has their faces on it) and an Emily The Strange leopard print tank top. (It seems HT has stopped selling Zotz. Oh, how I will miss those dear Zotz.)
I talked my mom into purchasing a fabulous pair or Baker heels. They have a jeweled cuff around the ankle that almost look like bracelets. They look like those beads you can find in the ocean in Mexico. I think she is happy, she hasn’t splurged on shoes lately.

What my point is, it remains a mystery to me if “Mr. Eli Cullen” is or is not still and employee working at Hot Topic.



Hello and Goodbye

May 17, 2009

Well Mackenzie, you’re almost eighteen and graduating high school. Let me just say, I am utterly sorry I cannot be at your graduation ceremony today. Though I hope you didn’t mind us calling to say hello.

I remember when you would come and stay with us for a week or so over the summer. My parents would pay you to watch my siblings and I and clean house a little. I think you were either twelve or thirteen when you said, “When I’m eighteen maybe I could drive you to the mall and we could go shopping together.” Or at least something like that. You have always been my favorite cousin and the nicest. Using your manners and if you ever did get mad or annoyed by me, you didn’t show it. I used to look up to you like you were the coolest girl on the planet. You would take me to the mall or play Barbies with me. There were times when you didn’t want to hang out with me, but you never did it in a mean way.

Now you’re going to college and turning eighteen and I’m still stuck at school. It feels like some parts of the years go by so quick while others drag on, and two weeks can feel like two months. Occasionally we would email each other, but I ran out of things to say. All I can say now is happy graduation and good luck when you go off to college this fall.

xoxox,

— Phoenixx


You’re Gonna Go Far Kid

February 16, 2009

I was thinking. If I was offered the opportunity to be a journalist for a music magazine (possibly Alternative Press or Rolling Stone) or to be a guitarist in an amazing band. Which would I choose? I had wanted to play guitar since I was nine years old. Practicing my air guitar in the privacy of my own room, completely spazing. Or pouring my guts out with ink and paper in hopes of becoming an utterly brilliant writer.

Being in a band would be quite interesting. I’d enjoy the fun questionnaires you get in interviews and your “humble” opinion on things. Looking super fierce in when you play live so you can intimidate people. Or to be some coffee drinking freak, blinded from the sun, glued to your computer, writing obsesser. Wearing T-shirts and tight jeans, strutting around like you know what you’re doing. Reader, does that thought ever cross your mind? I wonder where life will take me quite often. Who will I end up being in the next couple of years (I’m hoping I’ll stay true to who I am now.)?

Reader, let’s be honest. Would either of those jobs fully satisfy me? I seem to be quite an undecided person. I purchase an item at a store. “I love it! I’m so happy I bought it!” The next twenty minutes. “What the heck did I just waste my money on?! I could have bought ‘such and such’.” Yep, that is me. Being on the road with a band would be fun for a while. Awake at all hours, doing what you love, traveling, and playing shows. My only problem? I get motion sickness. I’d practically be bulimic. Then the shows would get tiring, performing the same songs until you write a new one. I suppose I shouldn’t think so negatively, maybe I’d be able to make a big impact on a lot of kids. Then there is writing. After a while, what is there to talk about? You are usually seen with a pen in your hand or your eyes are burning from staring at a computer screen for so many hours.

I guess I can be quite the “party pooper”, but that’s just me my friend. You either do or don’t like me, I don’t care too much. Either one I’d love. Writing would be easier to handle, though I’d miss the comfort of my guitar, Bella, too much. The excitement of playing a gig and going crazy on stage sounds and looks intruiging. Who knows where the world might take me….


Rid Me Of This Feeling

February 15, 2009

02/15/09

I’ve got an unquenchable feeling of uncertainty. I feel it when I fall asleep at night, I hope it will not wake up to it in the morning. I feel out of place with this feeling. Like I could use it to do something daring, something that the regular Phoenixx wouldn’t do. Maybe I’m just stressing myself out for no reason. Have you ever gotten the feeling where it feels like the skin over your ribcage is tightening? That happens to me when I’m hungry and occasionally when I’m stressing. I don’t understand myself fully. One day I’m, lighting the room with my smile, the next I’m sulking because I can’t find reason in ANYTHING. Some days I don’t know what I’m worried about. Though it could be everything. There is always something wrong with the picture you see. Whether it’s small or large, but the world is obviously an imperfect place.

Music is my cure for all of that. My medicine. My hate notes. My excitement. My everything. Music is there for me. If I’m happy I “head bang” to some Paramore, if I’m feeling angry I turn on My Chemical Romance’s first album (“I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love”) and blast “Our Lady of Sorrows” while screaming the lyrics. If I’m feeling whimsical and lighthearted I might fancy for some MGMT or Vampire Weekend. If I want to dance I’ll turn on the Gym Class Heroes. Feeling indie, maybe Radiohead, Straylight Run, or Lovedrug. Needing to relax I’ll play my Feist (“The Water” is my personal favorite). Anberlin just makes me want to take a minute and think about the lyrics then get back up and jump around. The Academy Is… is a good definition of pop punk. Punk but not to ranting instead, poppy, definitely something you could jump to. Maybe I should just turn on some music. Though it will only push back problems, but maybe that’s what I want.

“You gotta swim, and swim when it hurts.” — Jack’s Manequinn

“Can’t walk it off, can’t come clean.” — Lovedrug


REVIEW: “Burned” by Ellen Hopkins

January 31, 2009

My mother was kind enough to pick a copy up for me a few days ago. I devoured the whole book in one day. I was glued to just about every page as I was addicted to Ethan and Pattyn’s romance, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

Pattyn Von Stratten is a good Mormon girl. She feels plain,as she takes care of her stay-at-home mother’s jobs like cleaning, washing clothes, and taking care of her six younger siblings (technically five) along with the help of her favorite sister. While her mother lays around the house all day. When her father comes home with “Joannie” most nights, there is trouble. The kids are rushed back to their rooms as their mother takes the blow. The abuse. Pattyn has her first sex dream, and it involves her school crush. Though instead of kissing Justin, it is Derrick who steals her heart for the moment. After the first kiss there are a lot more, with tequila and beer along the way. One day her father finds her in the said, “compromising position”, and things keep going in a downward spiral for Pattyn until finally her father sends her to live with her Aunt J for the summer.

Living with Pattyn’s Aunt J was supposed to be a punishment not a reward, but things start to go Pattyn’s way. Then she meets Ethan. This can’t just be a summer fling, right? Right. Ethan shows Pattyn love, more than she had asked for. Though if her father were to ever find out she was dating than, Ethan who was not Mormon, they both would be dead. Literally. Pattyn has to go back home at the end of summer vacation. *** SPOILER ALERT*** As Pattyn takes the abuse from her father, bruises and blood are left. After that she finds out she is pregnant. Pregnant with Ethan’s baby. Plans are made for Ethan to come down and get Pattyn one day after school to take some time to ponder what they are going to do. Not noticing someone has taken off their licence plates, the police attempt to pull Ethan and Pattyn over during their “escape” drive. Pattyn orders Ethan not to stop, go faster. Until the accident. Ethan and the baby are both gone, dead. Pattyn is devastated (so was I) and decides life no longer matters….

I absolutely adored this book. I was intrigued with Pattyn and Ethan’s romance, which I wish could be real ALL the time. I loved her Aunt J, she reminded me of the woman who played Bella’s (Twilight) mother IN THE MOVIE. Happy, outgoing, smart, loving. I wish I had an aunt like that, cross that, I do. I was terribly annoyed that her mother, her sister, nor her own self told anyone (minus Ethan) about their beatings from their father/husband. This book explored the emotions of  joy, excitement, lust and love, complete with anger, hurt, devastation, and tragedy. Weaving together a masterpiece, which I would recommend to any Ellen Hopkins fans or just someone looking for a quick yet intriguing and beautiful read. FIVE OUT OF FIVE STARS.