I feel as if I’m twisted inside out. I feel like I should wring out my skin. It’s awful.
Spring break finally came but now spring break has ended. My short escape from reality has ended. I hid away in my room for days reading Fight Club and the late nights watching Donnie Darko and waking up at 10am. Since we recently got Netflix I would go down to the basement to watch Skins, a TV series in the UK, on the computer and ended up finishing the whole first season in two days. I went on walks and enjoyed the warm weather. I felt the wind blow my hair across my face and had arguments with my younger siblings. My spring break sufficed.
Why do the getaways end so quickly when reality drones on? Cram packed with people you don’t care for and don’t want to see, school days with tests and shithead math teachers, and then you have to remember that you are really young and there is hardly anyone your age who likes the same bizzaro stuff as you so you want to avoid your so-called “friends”. You come home and do your homework, practically skip dinner because it’s the same thing every night, and then you go to bed only to wake up the next morning and repeat the same procedure. Yep, story of my life.
I suppose a little break is better than no break at all. I sat in my room and listened to my iPod on shuffle for a little while. The sun peaked through my black window curtain onto my notebooks paper. I watched the black ink of my pen new rollerball pen bleed through the paper. Writing meaningless words, but I liked the way the pen moved so easily across the paper. I suppose I should realize more of the little moments like that, but when that’s all you can think about to get yourself through the next day you start to wonder, what’s the point? I mean the point of any of this? What’s the point of getting an education, the point of getting a job, the point of getting a house, the point having a family, what’s the point of life? Then as you simplify everything you begin to realize there isn’t one. And all of this came from being upset that spring break is over.
Song of the Day – Death March on Two, Ready? by Envy On The Coast