Comfort always made the rescue

September 26, 2009

I can barely stand to write about this right now for I feel I might just cry. Why oh why did Chiodos kick Craig Owens out of the band?! I only found out about this today, though it happened recently. Craig Owens WAS Chiodos. How could they kick him out just like that? So many times I turned to their music when I was feeling upset. Especially their song “No Hardcore Dancing In The Living Room”. Craig’s voice was what set Chiodos apart from every other band. (Though, I must say, the piano pieces were also very beautiful and Jason’s guitar riffs and hooks were pretty insane.)

I was on Polyvore looking at some girl’s set and she had commented that Chiodos kicked Craig out of the band. I thought I knew for sure this was a silly rumor. So I Googled it. Then I knew it was true when I saw that Alternative Press had covered this story. I read the article in shock, while inside I really did want to cry. I ran upstairs and yelled, “IT’S THE END OF THE WORLD.” My dad gave me a funny look then resumed watching something on TV. I ran into the kitchen and repeated myself, hoping my mom would ask what was wrong so I could rant.

I told my mom Craig had been booted from Chiodos and I ranted. All the while I told her this I almost started crying with sad, angry tears. How in the world could they make a new record and then decide that Craig can no longer be a part of it? How is that even fair?

Craig, I want to let you know that whenever you are touring with Isles and Glaciers or Cinematic Sunrise or even a solo tour and you happen to stop by Kansas City, I will be there to support you and your music. Though, nothing will ever be as amazing or the same as Chiodos. When Chiodos included you and Derrick Frost, you were the world to me. The old Chiodos still means the world to me. Now every time I shall listen to a Chiodos record, there will be a sadness left over.


It was alright but I’m not saying I want to go back.

August 24, 2009

Okay, so the first day back at school wasn’t so bad. It was better than I expected it to be, but that doesn’t mean it won’t be different tomorrow or that I’ve stopped hating it. Honestly, the only thing I’m really worried about is PE, opening my locker, and getting to class on time.

English is my favorite subject. I love to write and read new and interesting things. My only problem? I am stuck with a shitty teacher. She is old, mean and moody. During the whole class we just sat in her room listening to her lecture us about what we can and can’t do. At one point she said, “I’m not gonna treat you like you’re dumb. I’m not going to come over to you and comfort you and say, ‘Oh, it’s okay little retard.'” I guess all I can do is hope for a better English teacher in high school.

Thankfully, I knew a group of people from my old school or people I had met at summer school. Even though I don’t want to call all of them friends, it is nice to see someone I at least remembered. I got a little turned around walking through the hallways but I managed to find my way around. I’ve got to admit, I was a little late to some of my classes due to a crappy combination lock.

I hope tomorrow is better and a get the swing of things. At least after the first week you would think. Today was really just and orientation; and I was handed a many “syllabus”. There wasn’t any homework other than to take home all my papers and get my parents to read over them and sign them. Actually, I do have to write a paragraph about how Project Lead The Way got its start, but that barely counts. — The only class I’m really worried about is PE. I usually do the exercises required but that doesn’t mean I like them. I’m just afraid of looking utterly stupid. That would be a bad feeling. I’m not too keen on embarrassment.

Surprisingly, I think my favorite teacher so far is the Science teacher. Holy guacamole, she is a bundle of energy! I guess that’s it. I hope tomorrow I can shake of the early morning jitters faster. (Did I mention I have to wake up at 6:00 AM and get to school by 7:00? Well, if I didn’t now you know!)


We’re screaming at the same moon.

August 20, 2009

Craig Owens’s screaming is calming me down right now. It’s keeping me in the clouds. His screaming does two things for me. Either I want to headbang to the sound of Chiodos’s music or I want to go to relax to it. Not that it’s boring, but that it calms me down and puts me in a mixture of reality and fiction. It’s like I could pretend I feel the same way as Craig did after his first love broke his heart (thus he wrote an album about her). Yet this time I feel more like the instrumental rather than the lyrics. It’s like when I was listening to Brand New’s Déjà Entendu record.

Press my face up against the glass
with both eyelids shut and
baby this won’t get any easier
baby this won’t get any easier
baby this won’t get any easier

I’ll lie on the dirty carpeting in my room (that can’t be fixed unless we were willing to pay for new wood floors) and breathe. I like taking deep breaths because it makes me feel a little better. It takes some of the frustration away. — I sound cheesy again. — When I push all the frustration back I feel like and old toy disguised as a new one.

It’s not a big deal. It has been three weeks since my last guitar lesson but I’m mad at myself. This is part of learning, but I am always angry at myself for not knowing what he might throw at me. School starts next week. I was supposed to read two non-fiction books from a list they sent me. I lost the list and didn’t read the books. I have to be tested on them. I guess I’m just looking for more stuff to mope about.

We all have our good days and our bad days, yesterday was a mixture of the two.

Song Of The Day – “No Hardcore Dancing In The Living Room” by Chiodos http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJCX_Nit388

chiodos lyrics


I must be dreaming

July 29, 2009

I was panicking. We were living in a house with other vampires (think “Breaking Dawn” by Stephenie Meyer) who have all caught a disease. I don’t know what the disease is called, but it’s making them really hungry. Hungry for human blood. And I’m trying to figure out how I’m going to die because I don’t want it to be a gore fest. Whenever I read about vampires and events similar to this, I am not frightened. Of course it’s a book, but now after dreaming this, vampires are definitely scary.

My mom came home and walked into the bathroom. I opened the door to see her rubbing a washrag over her eyes. My mom put down the washrag; one of her eyes was an intense shade of red. She informed me about the disease, which turns out, is the reason why all the other vampires left the house. “Your scent was calling me back,” my mother said. I froze up and left the room.

There was a woman in the kitchen working on wooden crates. “These are for when it comes,” she said. ‘It’ meaning the slaughter. “Who is that for?” I asked, pointing down to a small crate split in half. The woman replied, “Your sisters.” I was scared and panicking again. I called my youngest sister into the kitchen. She tried to fit into one side of the wooden box and it wasn’t working. It was too small. I looked up at the woman and said, “She doesn’t fit.”

I woke up from this dream thinking, Thank God vampires aren’t real.

Song Of The Day – “Chocolate” by Snow Patrol http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GV6-pVn3Yo0


Amazing Because It Is

May 20, 2009

5/19/09

Yep, if you’re guessing the title of this post was inspired by The Almost’s song “Amazing Because It Is” then you are correct! I’m back with the usual topic, music. If you are a frequent reader of my blog I know this must get annoying. Unless of course you enjoy finding out about good bands and reading a young girl’s concert reviews. I should probably just say this is a blog meant for talking about music. But you see, some days I feel angsty or inspired and I want to be able to express that. So if you are already bored by my rambling I suggest you read something else.

I used to consider myself a music obsesser. Really, I’m just a music addict. It’s hard not for me to be without music for just one day. And today you will learn about me being inspired and listening to The Almost and Underoath, and mainly talking about Aaron Gillespie. Here’s the deal, one day way back when I heard about a band called Underoath. When I heard Underoath I couldn’t understand how someone could listen to another person’s screaming. Literally. My music taste has matured and changed quite a bit, and now I do appreciate some impressive screaming. I later heard about a little band called The Almost.

Now it’s May of 2009 and I’m listening to The Almost (and Underoath) and loving every single one of their songs. The overwhelming sound of Aaron Gillespie’s voice makes me stop what I’m doing just to finish the song. My personal favorite is “Dirty and Left Out”. You know you have those artists or albums that you can listen to over and over again? (In my mother’s case, it is Snow Patrol.) I have just found that band, and The Almost’s album is quite fabulous. And the fact that Aaron recorded all the instruments except for a few tracks on the album without anyone else is astonishing (he later formed the band). I find Aaron to be an amazing vocalist and drummer and I wrote this post to acknowledge that.


Mikey Way’s Wife

February 25, 2009

One afternoon while coming down to my chilled basement of course to log on to the computer, I checked my email. Now in my inbox I had an email titled, “Mikey Way’s wife…” The first time I saw if I thought it said “Mikey Way’s life…” and let out gasp thinking he had died. Instead it was an email from my mother. She knows the My Chemical Romance obsesser that I am and told me a woman whom she works with used to go to school with her. Now this may be cool or uninteresting, but hey, I’m just here to write, so don’t hate on Mikey or the band. –The woman’s name is Tracey, and I’m guessing she is like 27 years old and what a teeny thing she is! Tracey has auburn, chin length hair, has great bone structure in her face, and has I’m guessing a small five foot five frame. She came with my mom, Roxann, and I to the Buzz Stole Christmas concert back in December.– Anyway, Alicia Simmons, Mikey’s wife, went to the same high school. My mom said Tracey thought she was a bit strange and possibly a druggie. Tracey was unsure that Alicia had grown up to marry an awesome bassist such as Mikey Way. Then she saw a picture of Mikey and Alicia together or read in article in a music magazine and could finally believe it. Now Tracey is from Grain Valley Missouri and that gave me, the Missouri girl I am (though I live more in the city), some hope. Heck, maybe I’ll marry the next Kurt Cobain but I hope he doesn’t shoot himself in the head or snort cocaine or do any sort of drug really. In fact maybe I’LL be the next (female) Kurt Cobain without the drugs and suicide.