She loves everybody

September 24, 2009

She loves everybody.

After that little bump in the road last night, things were cleared up. I doubted her a little, but I guess she was just trying to be considerate. Well, it seems the “bump in the road” is determined to haunt me. I really do wish I had the nerve to say how much I want completely new friends so I guess this is the end of us. But she loves everybody, and she won’t let me go.

I think my favorite part about watching band interviews is seeing how much fun they have together. Their smiling joking faces; sitting with good friends. I think that was one of the reasons I wanted to be in a band for a while. But I changed my mind. My head might be in it, but my heart isn’t. I know it’s a long ways away, but I like plan ahead.

Anyway, I was talking to Taylor in the hall at the end of the day (that’s the girl whom I have similarities with, by the way). Yesterday I finally asked her if we could hang out sometime, and I mentioned the art fair this weekend. Well “the bump in the road” comes over and introduces herself. The whole idea of talking to Taylor, trying to get to know her, was to branch out and in particular, keep “the bump in the road” out of it.

I knew she would say something. She loves everybody. We got outside of the school building to look for our bus among the mass of kids and twenty or so busses and she said it. (No shit, there are in fact at least twenty busses. The reason for this is because we drive to the high school afterwards.) “Hey, you know that girl we were taking to? I kinda wanna be her friend since you guys are hanging out.” I just stayed silent because I know, and now you know that she loves everybody.


I want to scream at the top of my lungs.

June 25, 2009

I can’t stop smiling. I want to scream and punch things like a mad woman, but I can’t. Instead, I’ll just smile and run in circles while listening to Taking Back Sunday.

Last night I said to my mother, “I would do anything to see Taking Back Sunday again.” “Well, hon, it’s over. You can’t be mad about it,” she replied. My mother had it wrong. I wasn’t mad, I was extremely sad. I wanted to have a good cry over it. Really, I should be lucky I even saw Taking Back Sunday at all. Instead, I moped about not being close to the stage or to put it this way, I couldn’t see the stage at all. All I heard was my voice next to Adam Lazzara’s voice. It was like watching a YouTube video.

I sat on the bus today, God knows how hot it was. The humidity was stiffling, and I could just barely breathe. I flipped on my phone and pulled up the interent. I immeadiately checked my email, hoping there would be something worth reading. I opened one my mother had sent me. My jaw dropped. Taking Back Sunday were coming back to Kansas City September 4th with Blink-182 and Weezer. To top that off, tickets were only twenty dollars.

I turned to my friend and grabbed her arms and shook her wildly. “GUESS WHAT?! TAKING BACK SUNDAY ARE COMING BACK TO KANSAS CITY!!!” I yelled, hopping up and down in my seat. “Phoenixx, calm down,” she said to me, but I couldn’t. My stomach was way too excited to simply calm down. I knew instantly that this was going to be a damn good bus ride home.

Nothing mattered. All I cared about at that moment were tickets. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs with joy and race up my front porch. I wanted to kick at things violently because no one knew what I was feeling. I felt amazing.

I later found out the twenty dollar tickets sold out, BUT thirty five dollar tickets were still available. So of course I bought them. Nothing matters. Though Taking Back Sunday do matter, and I want to live in the moment of their performance because I know it will be stunning.


I Smiled

June 18, 2009

6/17/09

We sat in Dairy Queen
eating mouthfuls of our treats.
(Mine happened to be a Oreo Fudge Earthquake,
well something like that.
Yes I know, very fattening,
but I made sure to share with the rest of my siblings.)
He came and sat at the table next to us.
Big blue eyes with those long lashes
and those adorable chubby cheeks.
Blond hair and smiling.
I smiled back at him and he looked at back at all of us.
Four kids and two adults,
oh so many people.

We just sat there and smiled at each other for a while,
until my mother asked how old this cutie was.
The proud mom told us about two years old.
We then smiled some more.
His eyes big, staring in amazement.

It was soon time to leave Dairy Queen.
My stomach full,
I felt like an idiot smiling at this little boy,
but I kept grinning.
We stood up to leave and the little boy spoke,
“Bye kids.”
He made my day.