My eyes are tired, but I’ll stay awake for this last day of summer.

August 23, 2009

School starts tomorrow and I am still nervous. I have a headache right now. I’m trying to go without taking an Ibuprofen of Tylenol because I don’t want to get too dependant on them. I’m almost finished with “The Perks Of Being a Wallflower” and I love it. Yesterday I painted my nails with glittery nail polish. You can’t see anything other than the cleance Inside”ar coating and sparkles. When I think back to when I bought it, it was two days before Warped Tour. When I think about Warped Tour I think about how much I will soon be missing summer. I wish I could redo my summer and be more adventurous and do something really fun or meaningful, but I can’t. I suppose I shall just begin planning for next year.

I was listening to The Academy Is…’s album Fast Times At Barrington High this morning and thinking how much of a summer album it is. I was thinking about the song “Summer Hair = Forever Young” in particular (can you guess why?). I actually like the fall and winter much better than summer, but knowing that I don’t have school or homework to worry about the next day is always a nice feeling. I started singing it to my younger sister and decided I would just play it for all to hear. So I stuck the album into my sisters’ Hello Kitty CD player and listened to the whole album three times through.

The first time I sat in the kitchen and sang along in a whisper. The next time I played it while I was reading. The third time I listened to it during the car ride to the Ethnic Festival. (At the Ethnic Festival I came across some beautiful Kokeshi Dolls. I’ll post my pictures soon, but in the meantime you should read bout them. It has been another one of those melancholy days.

Despite the fact I talked about The Academy Is… (and even wore my concert T-shirt today) in this post, the Song Of The Day is “Dance Inside” by The All-American Rejects.

We’ve got a big mess on our hands

July 7, 2009

Damn, guilt.

How do you uninvite someone to go somewhere with you? Like the Vans Warped Tour, perhaps? Why can’t I just keep my mouth shut? I was looking to take someone my age, or a little older, but not her. We like a couple of the same bands but I just can’t see myself at a Chiodos set with her. I can’t see myself meeting John O’Callaghan from The Maine with her either.

Maybe her mom won’t let her go, but that’s selfish of me, isn’t it? Though this isn’t just anyone, this is Sarah. Sarah and I… we aren’t the same. We are friends but we are very different people. This is the girl likes to start arguments over silly misunderstandings, the girl who called me a bitch. I know those things are over and done with now, but I’m mainly just searching for excuses. I guess I shouldn’t bother inviting anyone to Warped Tour. Everything I say is a mess.

If I don’t bring it up again, maybe nothing will happen. I should just stick to keeping my concerts a secret from my friends like I did during the school year. If that’s going to work MY MOTHER needs to keep her mouth shut and stop bragging to people about it. I like to keep things secret, understood? What am I going to do?

In the words of William Beckett,
We’ve got a big, big mess on our hands tonight
Somebody get my phone so I can throw it in a public pool
and watch it float
And as it’s slowly sinking down become a social ghost

Rid Me Of This Feeling

February 15, 2009


I’ve got an unquenchable feeling of uncertainty. I feel it when I fall asleep at night, I hope it will not wake up to it in the morning. I feel out of place with this feeling. Like I could use it to do something daring, something that the regular Phoenixx wouldn’t do. Maybe I’m just stressing myself out for no reason. Have you ever gotten the feeling where it feels like the skin over your ribcage is tightening? That happens to me when I’m hungry and occasionally when I’m stressing. I don’t understand myself fully. One day I’m, lighting the room with my smile, the next I’m sulking because I can’t find reason in ANYTHING. Some days I don’t know what I’m worried about. Though it could be everything. There is always something wrong with the picture you see. Whether it’s small or large, but the world is obviously an imperfect place.

Music is my cure for all of that. My medicine. My hate notes. My excitement. My everything. Music is there for me. If I’m happy I “head bang” to some Paramore, if I’m feeling angry I turn on My Chemical Romance’s first album (“I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love”) and blast “Our Lady of Sorrows” while screaming the lyrics. If I’m feeling whimsical and lighthearted I might fancy for some MGMT or Vampire Weekend. If I want to dance I’ll turn on the Gym Class Heroes. Feeling indie, maybe Radiohead, Straylight Run, or Lovedrug. Needing to relax I’ll play my Feist (“The Water” is my personal favorite). Anberlin just makes me want to take a minute and think about the lyrics then get back up and jump around. The Academy Is… is a good definition of pop punk. Punk but not to ranting instead, poppy, definitely something you could jump to. Maybe I should just turn on some music. Though it will only push back problems, but maybe that’s what I want.

“You gotta swim, and swim when it hurts.” — Jack’s Manequinn

“Can’t walk it off, can’t come clean.” — Lovedrug

The Academy Is… (concert)

November 22, 2008

Standing in line in my light blue tutu and skinny jeans behind a guy in a demented rabbit mascot, is a pretty nerve wracking experience. I keep letting this stupid grin shine through, letting my vampire teeth stab at my bottom lip. I can hear The Academy Is… rehearsing so I sing along to “About a Girl”. Time passes and we chat with the guy in the rabid rabbit costume. He’s pretty funny, telling my mom I should have let her dress in her Trinity costume. Did I mention best costume prize is $1000.00 dollars?
I keep looking up at the tour buses parked along the side of the street, and then at the “Meet and Greet” line just envying those girls, staring ‘em down. I spot a guy from a TAITV video, no look! It’s their tour manager! My best guess was that they are going over to the “Meet and Greet” line. I sigh; a few more minutes pass by standing in line. My jaw drops. Is it The Butcher who just walked behind that tour bus?!?!! I’m in shock then I know it’s him! I’m waiting for him to come back around the tour bus, ready to gallop over and beg him for a picture. I figure he went to the “Meet and Greet”.
The band line-up is, Hey Monday, Carolina Liar, We The Kings, and The Academy Is… (in order).
I’m no fan of Hey Monday; actually I think the girl is rather annoying and that she can’t sing. Hey Monday rocked a song or two, had me bobbing my head a little. Hey Monday were fair performers so putting that energy out there helps with the atmosphere.
Carolina Liar has a slow sound but their music is infectious. They aren’t performers, though they got the crowd into the music. Listening to them live is similar to playing back a recording, only with screamy fan-girls. I can’t really jump to their music nor can I throw my head forth like a half head bang, I just enjoy the music.

Ah, yes We The Kings. I’m excited to see Travis Clark and his big red hair again. In fact, I had gone over to the merchandise table and bought a We The Kings shirt that reads “I love RED heads”. They may not be the best band in the world, because I’ve definitely heard better, though they aren’t half bad either. I’m trying to sing along to lyrics I don’t know and finally give up.
I’ll always remember Travis saying “You guys are SEXY!” of course it was a joke which makes it okay. I knew they would end with “Check Yes Juliet”, though I was never quite sure when.
Finally The Academy Is… comes on and the always gorgeous William Beckett comes out with this gray black button down long sleeved shirt. He’s got the sleeves pushed up, a few buttons at the bottom of the shirt undone, and fitting skinny jeans, when he lifts his arm you can see some stomach *swoons*. Not that I was paying any attention to that… hehe.

Let me tell you something, William Beckett is one heck of a performer. He’s up there climbing on speakers, drums, jumping off equipment, letting girls touch him, pulling people on stage, and grabbing cell phones. He’s pretty much like “Hey, come party with me!” the whole deal. I’m in the balcony, wishing I was close enough to touch that guy *sigh*.
They opened with “Summer Hair= Forever Young” and ended with “Almost Here”. My favorite song they performed was “After the Last Midtown Show” which reminds me of Edward and Bella (Twilight) every time. To put it lightly, it was an amazing night.