September 24, 2009
She loves everybody.
After that little bump in the road last night, things were cleared up. I doubted her a little, but I guess she was just trying to be considerate. Well, it seems the “bump in the road” is determined to haunt me. I really do wish I had the nerve to say how much I want completely new friends so I guess this is the end of us. But she loves everybody, and she won’t let me go.
I think my favorite part about watching band interviews is seeing how much fun they have together. Their smiling joking faces; sitting with good friends. I think that was one of the reasons I wanted to be in a band for a while. But I changed my mind. My head might be in it, but my heart isn’t. I know it’s a long ways away, but I like plan ahead.
Anyway, I was talking to Taylor in the hall at the end of the day (that’s the girl whom I have similarities with, by the way). Yesterday I finally asked her if we could hang out sometime, and I mentioned the art fair this weekend. Well “the bump in the road” comes over and introduces herself. The whole idea of talking to Taylor, trying to get to know her, was to branch out and in particular, keep “the bump in the road” out of it.
I knew she would say something. She loves everybody. We got outside of the school building to look for our bus among the mass of kids and twenty or so busses and she said it. (No shit, there are in fact at least twenty busses. The reason for this is because we drive to the high school afterwards.) “Hey, you know that girl we were taking to? I kinda wanna be her friend since you guys are hanging out.” I just stayed silent because I know, and now you know that she loves everybody.
February 16, 2009
I was thinking. If I was offered the opportunity to be a journalist for a music magazine (possibly Alternative Press or Rolling Stone) or to be a guitarist in an amazing band. Which would I choose? I had wanted to play guitar since I was nine years old. Practicing my air guitar in the privacy of my own room, completely spazing. Or pouring my guts out with ink and paper in hopes of becoming an utterly brilliant writer.
Being in a band would be quite interesting. I’d enjoy the fun questionnaires you get in interviews and your “humble” opinion on things. Looking super fierce in when you play live so you can intimidate people. Or to be some coffee drinking freak, blinded from the sun, glued to your computer, writing obsesser. Wearing T-shirts and tight jeans, strutting around like you know what you’re doing. Reader, does that thought ever cross your mind? I wonder where life will take me quite often. Who will I end up being in the next couple of years (I’m hoping I’ll stay true to who I am now.)?
Reader, let’s be honest. Would either of those jobs fully satisfy me? I seem to be quite an undecided person. I purchase an item at a store. “I love it! I’m so happy I bought it!” The next twenty minutes. “What the heck did I just waste my money on?! I could have bought ‘such and such’.” Yep, that is me. Being on the road with a band would be fun for a while. Awake at all hours, doing what you love, traveling, and playing shows. My only problem? I get motion sickness. I’d practically be bulimic. Then the shows would get tiring, performing the same songs until you write a new one. I suppose I shouldn’t think so negatively, maybe I’d be able to make a big impact on a lot of kids. Then there is writing. After a while, what is there to talk about? You are usually seen with a pen in your hand or your eyes are burning from staring at a computer screen for so many hours.
I guess I can be quite the “party pooper”, but that’s just me my friend. You either do or don’t like me, I don’t care too much. Either one I’d love. Writing would be easier to handle, though I’d miss the comfort of my guitar, Bella, too much. The excitement of playing a gig and going crazy on stage sounds and looks intruiging. Who knows where the world might take me….